Updated: Jul 15, 2020
All too often I've found myself hitting a dead end with one of my kids, like, I couldn't understand their behavior at the time or the changes they are/were going through because I hadn't been fully in tune with where they were/are in their growth and developed phase. It never usually hits me at that very moment, until I read up or someone reminds me and then fiiiinally it all begins to makes sense. Can you relate?
Maybe your two year old is having tantrums and you don't even realize he/ she is now two and it's normal. Maybe your 12 year old is going through puberty and emotional outbursts or maybe your 35 year old is still living in your house and you just didn't realize, hmmm you're an adult now and you need to move out and fend for yourself!!! (well hopefully not). 😅
Knowing these developmental phases will for sure affect how we handle situations and behaviors, and it will also shape and influence our initial response to their levels of responsibility, their ability to think abstractly, their independence and dependence and discipline.
Understanding our children/young adult kids changing and emerging growth and development is a crucial part of parenting and so is preparing for it ahead of time ( by preparing for it, I mean educating ourselves so we know what to expect to some degree). I believe it wouldn't be a total loss every now and again to have a squizz at where they are at, and how we can help them. And btw I'm not just referring to young kids I'm talking about from very young up to age 18 which is right into adulthood.
Not to disappoint you, but sadly I don't know it all 😅 and so I went in search of some resources about child development phases. There is so much free and available information digitally, but I did stumble upon this link which you can reference, and I found it puts it nicely. Although it doesn't cover every. single. thing. ☺️... it's an informative overview, where you can identify where your kid might be at, basically from a baby to 18 years old and how you can help!
Investing this little bit of time resourcing ourselves to know this information can have enormous benefits for us as parents... I mean just think about it, we would possibly be calmer, react to their needs in a more thoughtful and less frustrated manner, we would avoid attributing their challenges to things that are in actual fact unrelated, and we would be in a better position to provide them with the support they need when they need it. And this is just to name a few.
Perhaps this will help us better appreciate the phase we find them in and also find the fun and joy in it too.